the dream

childlike, broken open
the dream comes again
guilt anger pain
i want to do things differently
go back in time
in the dream
the house still sits
empty
waiting
and you are still alive
i advocate for your return
reading old love letters
written on scraps of paper
glued together from your collection
explain to liz how my mom did you wrong
years later another breakdown
i wake and worry
don't let me be next.

vermicular parasites.

Have been having parasite dreams again this week. last night we were on a bus, with z and my ma. people were setting up booths and selling things. we were looking at some bags and a jacket that imani was making, checking out her handywork, and z was interested in buying a bag to carry books, but i wasn't quite sure the design was rights for books and suggested maybe she could get something customized.  firewalker was there and when i asked how he was doing he said not well at all, as he still had vermicular parasites, in fact he was looking thin and pasty white.  hmmm.

homeland security

was training for some position vital to national security, did not follow the rules and got in BIG TROUBLE! go figure....

bobcat and piano

haven't been keeping up with my dreams lately, need to get back in the habit of writing them every morning.  when i work on it i usually remember them every night, when i let it slide they drift away.  however, i did see a bobcat in my dream last night. also, recently have been playing piano in my dreams, and i can remember seeing the music in detail and figuring out the notes. also need to get back in the habit of regular piano practice. so many hobbies... so many jobbies!